The decision to separate is never an easy one. Whether the decision was yours or your partner's, you will both be feeling a lot of mixed emotions.
Even when a separation has been expected, it's common to feel a sense of shock or numbness as you begin to work through the practicalities that the decision involves. You might also feel anxious about the future and overwhelmed by the number of decisions that you need to make.
There is a lot of designs that need to be considered when separating from a partner, this can be difficult when you both would like different things to happen. Mediation is a effective way to solve your problems and create a solution that both partners would be happy with.
What decisions do we need to make?
The children - your children often would like a say in what happens and it is important to know there thoughts. Deciding how both parents will keep a secure bond with their children is also key. You'll need to think about access arrangements, child care, telling the school, seeing in-laws, birthday and Christmas arrangements. You also need to discuss how to talk about your children's emotions.
Property - you'll need to decide who will live where. Can one of you stay in the same house or will you sell up and both move? Who will get what from the home and where will pets live?
Finances - You will have more expenses to cover because you are splitting from a joint home. It will need to be discussed who pays which essential bills for the children.
Friends and Family - How will we tell our Friends and Family about our separation? How will we keep a good relationship for the children with their grandparents?
Communication - How much will we need to discuss as parents? How will we keep a civil relationship to make sure with each other?
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How can Mediation help me?
Mediation can help each of you put forward your point of view and be heard by one another, and help you to express your feelings without arguments. The Mediator will explore and identify various options with you both.
Mediation aims to strengthen communication and help you to make your own informed decisions to gain the best solution for you that you feel comfortable to move forward with.